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大家好！Hello, everyone!
I'm writing to you from my motherland: China. This is my first time back in about 18 years, and it has probably been my greatest experience with the concept of "and, also." The purpose of this trip, for me, was to have my boots on the ground, to immerse myself in hearing the mother tongue, and indulging in the food (a lot of food!). I am happy to report that my spice tolerance has increased a little while here.
This trip has been a whirlwind to say the least. I’m navigating a language that feels so audibly recognizable, while not understanding nearly enough to get very far. I’m adapting to cultural behaviors that are different from the ones I see and experience daily. I’m flipping back and forth between different apps to order meals, translate signs, and get from place to place. I’m riding the waves of curiosity, anxiety, joy, fear, fatigue, hunger, awe, frustration, and also desire.
My haven throughout this trip has been the People's Parks. Everywhere you look, there are folks practicing 气功 qìgōng, dancing, singing in choirs, smoking cigarettes, admiring the resumes at the matchmaking market, or simply walking, observing, and eating a snack. The parks have been the places where I've been able to slow down and take it all in.
As I sit and reflect, I acknowledge that this is a place where I want to blend in, and also feel seen. It's a place that I am in love with, and also don't necessarily like. It's a place where I am filled with so much curiosity, and also feel like my mind is on overload; where I look like a local, and also sound like a foreigner. It’s a place I find extremely energizing and also paralyzingly exhausting.
Also-Known-As President Sara Crayne-Dedrick on a return trip to her birth country this past month.
As we step into National Adoptee Awareness Month (NAAM), I find myself thinking about the many ways international adoptees navigate their birth country return. I think about those who have returned multiple times, those who have decided to move back, those who hesitate to return, those who have returned once and decided that was enough, those who cannot return whether they want to or not, those who do not wish to return, and everyone in between. There is no universal way to navigate our relationships with our birth countries, our histories, our identities, or the circumstances that brought us into our adoptive families. And there doesn't need to be.
NAAM is not simply about recognizing adoption. It is about listening to adoptees, acknowledging the lifelong impact of adoption, and making room for the full range of our experiences. That includes the joyful, the complicated, the beautiful, the uncomfortable, and sometimes the painful. It means recognizing that adoption doesn't stop being part of someone's story when they reach adulthood. Its impact can shift, resurface, and take on new meaning throughout a person's life.
Adult adoptees have lived experience, perspectives, and insights that deserve to be heard, respected, and centered. We need spaces where adoptees can speak honestly without having to make their experiences more palatable, explain away their complexities, or arrive at a particular conclusion about their adoption.
There are many ways to participate in NAAM. This month, especially, I invite you to listen to adult adoptees, make space for stories and perspectives, join us at an upcoming event, engage with adoptee-led conversations and resources, or support the work being done to ensure adoptee voices remain at the center of adoption conversations. To my fellow adoptees, I hope this month offers opportunities for you to feel seen, heard, and connected. Your experiences are yours, and they deserve space.
And perhaps, as we move through this month, we can all make a little more room for the "and, also." For the things that can be true at the same time. For the questions that don't have easy answers. For the experiences that don't fit neatly into a single narrative.
From the motherland,
Sara Crayne-Dedrick 马酉维
Have you recently traveled to your birth country and are looking for a space to process? Or have you been thinking about visiting your birth country and are curious what that experience might look like?
Join us for a community forum featuring panelists who have recently traveled to their birth countries. We'll share experiences, reflect on the many layers of “return” for adoptees, ask questions, and learn from and connect with one another.
Optional: After, we'll head to a local pay-your-own-way dinner to continue the conversation.
When: Friday, Nov, 13 (7-9 pm)
Where: 115 W 27 St, 6th fl, New York, NY
Who: Adoptees only
Cost: Sliding scale, $5-$25 at the door
Join us for a cozy afternoon of connection, gratitude, delicious food, and celebration with our community! Bring a dish to share, and get ready to get in on some mahjong fun (no experience required). We will also have a during-event donation table for attendees to give away or take home new or gently used items. Open to adoptees, their families, chosen families, and friends.
When: Saturday, Nov. 21 (1-4 pm)
Where: 35 W 35 St, 12th fl, New York, NY
Who: Adoptees, family & friends
Cost: Sliding scale, $5 to $25
We’re thrilled to host our annual holiday party, welcoming adoptees, allies, and friends to celebrate and close out the year together! ❄️ The evening features delicious food (included), great drinks, music 🎶, raffle prizes 🎟️, and limited-run merch to collect. We look forward to coming together to connect, share laughs, and toast to our incredible community at one of our signature seasonal gatherings! 🥂❤️
When: Friday, Dec. 4 (6-10 pm)
Where: TapHaus33, 14 E 33 St, New York, NY
Who: Adoptees, friends & family (21+)
Cost: Free for members! $50 for non-members
No more “nice” adoptee!* Give yourself permission to express your true feelings and let your inner rage out in a supportive group of fellow adoptees. Smash old plates and office equipment—and maybe a few adoptee narratives and conventions—in a safe environment. Come fend off winter stress and blues with this cathartic physical activity. (*Being nice is always cool, too.)
When: Tues, Dec. 15 (7-7:30 pm)
Where: 326 Stagg St, Brooklyn, NY
Who: Adoptees only
Cost: $40 per person
Honoring Our Stories, Building Our Future: A Global BIPOC Adoptee Convening
Held during National Adoptee Awareness Month (NAAM), this two-day global gathering unites BIPOC adoptees in community, learning, storytelling, and collective action to advance adoptee justice and belonging.
Friday & Saturday, November 13–14, 2026 (Virtual) | Register now
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